BADLY DRAWN MATCH REPORT #9 - MANCHESTER UNITED vs NEWCASTLE UNITED

Can you hear the lambs, Clarice? What will they bleat out after United's match against Newcastle? Are you ready? Fly, fly, fly Clarice, fly, fly, fly.

Rumours were swirling that Jose was on the verge of being booted out of Manchester United.

And it started poorly for Jose & United. Newcastle raced to a 2-goal lead & things looked bleak for the United manager. Indeed United under Jose don't do comebacks very well.

Ashley Young channeled the the spirit of club captain, Antonio Valencia, and played the welcoming host to Newcastle's forwards.

The lambs, Eric Bailly & Scott McTominay were sacrificed by Jose in a desperate effect to change the game. Johnny Kill took up the challenge.

The blogger extraordinaire Juan Mata started the comeback & Captain Body Language Anthony Martial linked up with Paul Pogba to level the score.

And the piano man completed the swing heading home to snatch a dramatic win for United. It's only the third time that a Jose Mourinho side have overturned a two-goal deficit to win a Premier League game.

So Jose's purgatory continues, voluntarily of course. Who in their right mind would walk out on a 20 million plus quid golden handshake? Can you hear the lambs? Can you hear them screaming? No, well that's because it's actually Jose yelling.