BADLY DRAWN MATCH REPORT #3 - WATFORD vs MANCHESTER UNITED

Will there be a gratuitous reference to the Watford Gap? Read on and find out

In the build-up to the match Jose Mourinho decided to talk a little about Marcus Rashford's stats & the formulas that determined them to anyone who'd care to listen.

United decided to counter Watford's good form by using the all powerful pink kit. However the bearers of the pink tops did let Watford have a good sniff of goal. Fortunately, Dave saved...again

United did take the lead though as Romelu Lukaku stomached Ashley Young's cross in as the Watford backline decided to go walkabout. Ben Foster, for his part, heroically tried to determine if Lukaku was still wearing his Christmas pants.

Chris Smalling, surprisingly, doubled the lead with a finish reminiscent of United's leading marksmen from years gone by. There is a perfectly logical explanation for Smalling's inexplicable act of skill though.

Of course, United being United, refused to do things the easy way & played the role of good guests to perfection as Watford pulled a goal back.

Nemanja Matic feeling sorry for both Mike Dean & Marcus Rashford decided to get sent off in a true act of altruism. In a stroke he gave Dean license to go a bit "Mike Dean" & ensured he'd give Rashford company for the next fixture. Course he knew DDG would tidy his mess up.

United are on 9 points now. Young Boys are up next in the Champions League. Crisis? What crisis?